Five Fears from the Shrink’s Couch

The ball bulges the back of the net and I throw my hands up in disgust, but the half-heartedness of the gesture betrays my true feelings.  Not disappointment or anger, not even pain.  Instead it was that bitter resignation which takes up shop in a fan’s heart around the time he realizes that his club is hopeless.  For some supporters, that resignation is perennial, it congeals into a thick layer of cynicism gilded with black humor, the only defense mechanism of the eternally disappointed.  They have no choice really, it is either that or walk away from the team altogether, which is undoubtedly the saner of the two choices.  Honestly, I can only imagine the existential plight of a Detroit Lions fan sitting there witnessing defeat number sixteen and knowing all the while that he will be renewing his season tickets next year.  Subjecting oneself to such torture and mind-numbing mediocrity for the sake of such a nebulous idea as “your team” is either the height of nobility or utter madness.   

  Fortunately, for Quakes fans, the situation is not quite so dire.  We have tasted success and the pinnacle of glory, not once but twice.  Perhaps, this makes it even harder for us to accept failure than supporters with empty trophy cabinets (I’m talking about you, Colorado and New York).  Still, the first five years of our existence as an MLS franchise thickened our skins, when it looked as if we would be the eternal laughing-stock of the league.  We learned to endure watching Clash soccer, not enjoy it.  We learned to prepare for losses before the ball was even kicked.  But even for the eternal losers, there is always a small kernel of hope, one that is kept deep inside and never breathed aloud even as a joke.  Even after a hundredth losing season, there would still be a glimmer of belief that this season would finally be the one to change it all.  For Quakes fans, that hope was finally realized with the arrival of Yallop and a new crop of players.  Success became expected.  Then the ultimate heartbreak, which only a chosen crop of fans has had the misfortune to endure: the supporter’s version of death, to have your team moved.  We have come back from the dead, endured countless heartbreaks, all of which can give you more psychological complexes than a lifetime of broken marriages.  With that said, I will sit on the shrink’s couch and relate the top five fears that are plaguing me at the moment:

 

5. Huckerby leaving

 

Norwich may have been relegated, but Huckerby would undoubtedly prefer League One (the English third division) over the pub team he is currently on.  Besides which, such things matter very little to a player like Huckerby whose loyalty outstrips any such concerns.  If we had a decent squad that was making progress towards the playoffs, then I think Hucks would be tempted to stay a little longer in San Jose, but as it is, I don’t think anyone could blame him for escaping this train wreck when his contract expires.  It is a shame that we haven’t been able to see an 100% fit Huckerby so far this season.  Hopefully we’ll get to see him soon and get our last taste before he leaves.  

 

4. Joe Cannon getting dumped on

 

This has already begun, as some fans have begun to do the unthinkable: question The Joe.  While there have been a couple of mistakes (most glaring of which was the third Chicago goal which should have been saved), I think what many fail to realize is that lack of confidence is contagious.  When the defense in front of a keeper is shaky and lacking belief, then this has the inevitable effect of inspiring indecision and nerves in the keeper himself.  In my humble opinion, Joe has not “lost it”.  He has demonstrated many times this season, that his reflexes and shot-stopping are still of a high quality.  To me the problem is all psychological at this point.  Put a quality defense and a midfield who can shield in front of Cannon, and you’ll see the old Joe back.  Take away Joe and we probably wouldn’t even have the Houston win.

 

3. Finishing below L.A. once again

 

As all supporters know, there is one thing which is indeed worse than a losing season, and that is finishing below your hated rival.  To finish below the Scum always induces a bit of nausea, and bragging rights are the currency of all rivalries.  Last year, we could use the expansion label as an excuse, but we have no such luxury this time around.  

 

2. Picking up the Wooden Spoon yet again

 

As things stand right now, this one looks like a damn near certainty.  For those who don’t know, the Wooden Spoon is the “prize” given to the team who finishes dead last in the league.  We picked up one last year, as well as in 1997 and 2000 (widely regarded as our worst season ever).  At this rate, 2009 may end up as the new benchmark of failure for the Quakes.  No other club in the the league has more than one, and we are in serious danger of picking up number four.  At stake is the true identity of this team.  Are we the feisty and gutsy team of 2001-2005, or was that just a blip in the history of a losing club?  

 

1. Frank Yallop getting the axe

 

At this point, more and more Quakes fans are losing faith in Frank and calling for his head despite it being only eight games into the season.  Yet such a reaction is somewhat understandable given that from all appearances it looks as if we have actually regressed from last year, an almost unforgivable season in a club’s sophomore season after the obligatory putrid expansion year (obligatory unless you’re Seattle that is).  Still, I refuse to give up on Frank.  He came into San Jose and transformed a team with no prospects and no future into a championship club and a perennial contender.  The magic of those years lives long in the memory, and it is perhaps sentimentality, if nothing else, which makes me refuse to lose faith in Yallop.  But I think there is some practical content to my feelings as well.  Despite the raised expectations and dashed hopes of this season, Yallop’s tenure at this point still only consists of one full season and eight games.  It took three years for Sigi Schmid to build a championship team out of Columbus, and people were calling for his head in seasons one and two.  Patience and stability are key in building a team from scratch, and I’m not convinced that the benefits from changing coaches outweigh the harm of introducing a culture of instability once again to the club.  More than anything, it would be a blow to everything I know and hold dear as a Quakes fan to see such a key and beloved figure in Quakes history as Frank Yallop be unceremoniously canned.  I am actually shocked a bit at how easy it is for some fans to toss him aside.

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